How To Keep Your Divorce Out of Court

Leaving the fate of your family in the hands of Minnesota Courts may not lead to the best outcome.

As a true believer that one’s best life is found by seeking self-determination and using one’s instinct, the same is true when determining the future of one’s family. For that reason, divorce court should be your last resort. Think about it: why would you want a complete stranger (Judge) deciding the parenting plans, making financial decisions, and directing your living arrangements? I sure wouldn’t…

According to an article in Business Insider, 90% of divorces settle out of court. You too can keep your divorce out of court with my 4 Things You Need to Know: Keeping Your Divorce Out of Court:

  1. Sit down with your spouse. Approach this Divorce discussion with your spouse with an open heart and open mind. Talk about how finances will likely be split including any assets and liabilities that you have as a couple, an ideal parenting plan based on your work schedules, living arrangements in the next 6 months or so, and how you are going to break the news to the kids.
  2. Try it again. Go back to the drawing board. Seek therapy I cannot promise that your initial sit down “talk”  will be successful. If you find that you are not making progress, I implore you to seek the counsel of a professional. Clients often meet with me in my office where I listen to their fears and concerns and I tell them that I don’t think they are ready yet. I then refer them to counseling. If professional therapy is not something you feel comfortable trying, at the very least, try, try and try again. You may just find out that the “grass is not always greener…” and work it out with your spouse.
  3. Consider Mediation. If you feel you need some extra help reaching an agreement, consider hiring a mediator to help mediate the discussion. A mediator does not represent either you or your spouse. Rather, she is an unbiased third party who helps facilitate conversation by focusing on emotions and practical needs.
  4. Find an attorney. Find a good attorney who is a problem solver, rather than someone who creates problems. An attorney who focuses on collaboration and conflict resolution will not only be cost effective, but will also lessen the emotional impact that this unfortunate process has on your life.

As I say to clients during my initial consultations: My goal is to leave a family better than I found them. If you would like to discuss how you can keep your family law issue out of court, give me a call, I look forward to talking to you.


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